The moment in everybody’s life when you lose somebody you care about – this is the end of an era. Not a person you adored or who was very close to you, a member of the family, your-soul mate or best friend. No, it’s about a person from outside your family, but the one who has influenced you a lot and has represented by him/herself a strong wire in the complex tissue of your life. Like a mentor. Or an old aunt.
Many people, on different places and times, have been expressing their feelings after losing Wayne Dyer, for example – as his person and philosophy and life have influenced so many people. The end of an era, for many. But we all have an old aunt, let’s call her Helen. In fact, she’s kind of aunt: maybe she’s the aunt of some other member of your enlarged family, or she has been one of your neighbors, for many years. She has been close to you so much time! like all your life – and sometimes she was there even long before you were born. She assisted at all kind of events in your life, or she even determined them. Not to mention her great pleasure to tell those stories again and again, in front of many other people. Have you already smiled, haven’t you? You do have your Aunt Helen. Her lost was the end of an era, too.
Just focus and you’ll remember her. Some years ago, it was her cat that you chased like a warrior, you broke her windows or precious dish. You might still hear her calm, terrified or threatening voice during some of your meetings. She gave you sweets when you were a child or ten bucks instead of five for your work in her garden, when you were older. She bandaged your knee while telling you the story of a powerful king, or a real story from the time when your father or mother was little and scared just like you. Because of (or despite of) your mutual feelings, she gave you a hug when you really needed it. Or you have met your future husband or wife in her house. She saw you kissing and she never told anyone. Or she borrowed you some money, teaching you a lesson about it, too. She was the one who was making the best chocolate cakes you have ever eaten, or the most elegant person you have ever met. Her voice was so sweet!.. or so annoying! you can remember it even now…. It’s not the end of an era, after all, is it?
Look in your past or present – she is here, somewhere around you. She is always present or always discrete, crying for your help or giving hers to you. In someone else’s life (let’s hope for the best) you’re an Aunt Helen. Everybody is, as we all have family and friends and neighbors and strangers around us. Knowing that, let’s remember our (dear or not) Aunt Helen. Maybe you have many. Each one having something special that makes her unique. Flavor, smell, gesture, tone, smile… Aunt Helen. Your Aunt Helen.
Let’s pay an homage to our Aunt Helen. You have seen her getting older or sick, maybe you were there in her last moments or you simply heard the news of her death. One might be very upset for losing her, or crying… or none of these. One might think: ‘She was so old’ and then just pass over the news. But when she dies, your life changes a little. Your world changes a little – or more – and needs some rewiring. Her house will be sold and repaint, there is no one who makes those cakes for you. You can’t complete your family tree anymore. She had phoned you from time to time, always in a bad moment, when you didn’t have time or energy or proper the state of mind. Your mother had told you to phone your Aunt once in a few months, and you were not quite delighted to do it. But you will now miss those calls. The moment you realize that there will be no more phone calls or chocolate cakes is the final moment of an era. Aunt Helen counts.
For the ones who passed away and left you for a better place, here is a suggestion. Apart from being grateful to your present Aunts, let’s be good to somebody else’s aunts. Complete strangers for us. Do something kind for another person, woman or man, as you also have uncles, not only aunts. Say ‘She/He reminds me of my aunt/uncle’ then smile. Help. Make a difference in her/his day. Contribute to some joy.
And let us know. Let’s express our strength and sensibility and love for any Aunt Helen ever.